The process of being adored.

Hello, my name is Jamie and my husband adores me. Yes, adores. And it feels awesome. Last week in the mail I got a sweet love letter from my husband (mailed from his office). It expressed his deep love and affection for me, was kind and also funny. Just like he is; all the elements that make life wonderful and fun. An excerpt;

"I feel like I'm extraordinarily fortunate to have found you and ensnared you by sweet, sweet trickery, to be my wife."

See? Eloquent, loving and funny, the perfect combo. He writes me these letters from time to time and I keep each one and on occasion pull them out and read them. They always make me feel fabulous. He also brings me flowers every Friday, usually a couple dozen which I absolutely love. He has an amazing ability to give great presents that are thoughtful and insightful. He kisses me and tells me how beautiful I am. He pinches my bum and tells me when I'm being sexy. :)

When I'm cranky and can't be nice anymore he takes the kids, bathes them and puts them to bed. Then threatens them with the fear for their lives if they get out of bed and bug mom. Just love him for that! He won't let me open my own door and insists that our boys open my door for me everywhere we go. He takes me to parties that he doesn't want to go to. We hold hands when we are together.

When we go to bed at night we lay down and talk for a good hour or two about anything and everything. He takes me out to restaurants that I love and he doesn't. He allows me to be independent and do things that are important to me. We laugh every hour that we're together. He dances around the house for me.

Yes he is wonderful and I love him. We were talking a few nights ago about our marriage and how happy we are to have such a great one. A few weeks ago we had gone out to dinner with some friends and Chad's romantic ways came up (all the guys were silently wishing him dead).

Later that night while laying in bed chatting Chad said,
"everyone wants to be adored by their husbands but aren't willing to do the work to be actually adored, you are so that makes it easy."

I was grateful for the nice comment, it got me thinking about the process of being adored. And I thought I'd write down some of the stuff I do to make my marriage happy. When he comes home I try to greet him, (if I'm on the phone I get off right away) and go to the door to say hello.

A couple times a week I try to think of some of Chad's favorite meals and make them for him. If I can keep the kids from it I let him get the mail because he just loves mail (who doesn't!). I let him sleep in on Saturday morning. I wear red lipstick just for him. I lock the children outside and won't let them in so I can 'take five' and not be frazzled when he gets home.

I'll make him his favorite cookies on Sunday's. I'll take care of the babies when it's his turn; sometimes. I dress up and try to look pretty for him everyday (some days it just doesn't happen). I curl my hair the way he likes it.

I tell my kids no (mostly because it just feels so darn good) but I do this so that I'm not so emotionally/physically spent by the time he gets home. I want to still have energy left for him every night. I want him to know that he is my priority. So I adjust my schedule to reflect that desire. I nap each day so as to have energy to stay up till the wee hours chatting with my man.

Dad. Stop reading here. Do that for both of us. I try to give it up, frequently. And I put some effort into that. I do my hair, a little lipstick and other stuff (use your imagination). I'm quick apologize if I speak to him with tone. I'll listen to him play his guitar (sometimes). I'll mow the lawn so that he won't have to do it on Saturday.

Okay Dad, you can pick up here. I try to run our household proficiently so he doesn't have any worries. If I see he's stressed about something I'll try to build him up and make him feel better. The general theme here is that I try to think of him and thus he thinks of me (and it probably started the other way around). It makes for a really happy great life.

He's by far the very best thing in my life. Every year is better than the one before. That's not to say that we haven't had some really hard, challenging trials placed before us. Between raising children, health issues, work, etc. Life can be hard. Who knows what challenges this life has in store for us still but I know one thing. That we'll be getting through them together, loving each other through it all.